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First i want to say i am a feminist man. so FEM is for feminist.

Second, FEM is for feminine.

i am transitioned into a feminine man.

being feminist  first, i am struggling to identify my presentation as a female.  i should not use make up. i need not remove facial hair.  i do not believe surgery or hormone treatment is the right fit for me.  so mostly i look like a man in a dress.  the struggle for me is fitting  my persona into any of the LBGT expressions  i observe in the media. by practice i have been a bisexual man my entire life.

i was born male and so i preformed the male role in life to the best of my ability.  yet in my secret desire i wanted to be a girl, when i was young.  in the 80's surgical transition from male to female became possible. i secretly wished i was 19 then so i could make that choice at a more reasonable stage of life. i really championed the young men who became women. also the young people in the 80's and 90's began a none gender fashion sense. i easily identified myself with the equity expressed in an asexual presentation .... i may not be a girl but i didn't have to look like a man.  i had already shared my secret thoughts with my feMALE partner, who i has been studying feminist theory and woman's story with. the issues in our experience with men who transition to women was a cyclone of failure, success, celebrations and always controversy.

my education as a feminist continued into the 90's when the men's movement began. i became active in the movement to stop violence against women. i was a member of a men's group that learned how to listen to women. as i learned how to listen to women, i became even more confused about what it would be for me to present as a woman. 

in 2003  i established the image of EX-Man in my mind. and in my artwork. a man must be able to embrace women's values and intelligence. that is why the peacemaker is a man holding a broom. he is not afraid to stand for justice or non-violence. he is not afraid of women's work. he will clean up the mess the patriarchy has created in civilization. he will embrace equity with women. he will be a caregiver to children. he will be a caregiver to life.

so i said "i am as a woman". 

this is not a sexual transition. it is a transition none the less.  still my inclination was to present as a female one day.

now i want to change my identity to a female persona.

 so FEM is now also for Feminine Equivalent Man.   

i am FEM

about Betty

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